Yield Not to Temptation

     This year for Lent, I decided to give up desserts and shopping (I have a penchant for buying dresses unnecessarily). As you might have imagined, this has only increased my yearning for them. What is it about the forbidden that makes it so desirable?

     When I was in college, one of my girlfriends began carrying on with one of the fiancés of one of my graduated sorority sisters. It started as a drunken mishap at a party. She'd had a crush on him from the time that she'd met him, especially after working with him on our school's student government. One day we were getting lunch and she brought up the party, as it had just happened the previous weekend.

     "I think I drank too much at the party," she sighed.

     "Oh, yeah?"

     "Yeah. I did something I probably shouldn't have."

     I didn't know what else to say. Prying for information has never been my style.

     "Yeah. You know Nicolette?"
 
     "She's one of my sisters, but she was graduating the year I was initiated. So, I didn't see a lot of her."

     "Do you know her fiancé?" she asked.

     "I know of him," I wondered where she could be going with this line of questioning.

     "I did some things I shouldn't have... with him."

     I grew silent for a while. I didn't want her thinking that what she did was right, but I also didn't want her thinking I was about to get out my soap box. In addition, she did this with the soon to be husband of one of my sisters. I was in a very shaky place. Although, I must admit I was not happy that she'd carried on with an engaged man.

     "He's engaged. Why would you do that?"

     "Well, I've always liked him and he kissed me first."

     "It doesn't matter. Don't let this situation escalate further. Nip it in the bud."

     "It was a drunken mistake. It won't happen again."

     As her friend, I took her word. Plus, she was 19. Who knows men, let alone the world, at 19? About a month and a half later on the way to the mall, she confessed that she's had another liaison with him.

     "I won't condemn you, but I don't condone what you've done. This isn't a mistake anymore."
 
      "Crystal, he's not happy. He's only marrying her because both they and their families have known each other for so long."

     I confess, her logic got my back up a little.

     "He's using you. If he is so unhappy, why did he propose?"

     "He only did it because that is what is expected of him."

     Her excuses only boiled me more.

     "Then he needs to be a man and be honest with her."

     There was no convincing her. I found out these encounters continued on and off up until the beginning of his marriage. They eventually stopped their affair, but it was the principle. He was older and knew how she felt and used it to his advantage. However, she is also at fault. She knowingly embarked on this affair with him and justified them with the same patchwork of excuses he'd given her.

     No matter how temping something may appear, you have to look at the possible drawbacks. Some temptations are harder to resist than others. If you give in, you have to be ready for what comes with it. The grass isn't greener on the other side, it's greener where it is watered.