Chased and Restrained

     When you have an attraction to someone, it is nice to have that person notice you back. You use subtlety to gain more attention, but how long is too long to wait for a final result? When is the "back and forth" too much?


    As you my remember, in February, I mentioned I had a crush. He and I saw each other few and far between. In June, we had the opportunity to get lunch and talk. We chatted about our respective lives, jobs and everything we could think of. He mentioned that he was free the following Saturday and asked how I spent my free Saturdays. I told him I tried to relax since I so rarely have them. He mentioned that he hadn't been to my town's newly renovated Farmer's Market. I hadn't either at the time, so I was excited at the prospect of where this was going. He said that we should meet up and he'd give me a call if he went down there. I was optimistic, but I didn't get my hopes up. I've crushed on this guy for 2 years without anything solid to speak of. No matter who I dated, he somehow snuck into my thoughts. Even with my feelings, I refused to be unrealistic. There was no way that he didn't know I was attracted to him. The ball was now in his court. It was up to him to act.


     When that next Saturday rolled around, I had to attend a wedding. It didn't matter because he never called me, so I was right not to build my expectations. At that moment, I had an epiphany. I had tried to get his attention. Where was his effort? He'd had a golden opportunity to get my undivided attention and he didn't use it. Before I'd have chalked it up to him being more introverted than me, but even a really shy guy will put forth more effort if they like you. I deduced that he must not feel as strongly about me as I thought. When a guy wants you, he lets you know.


     As you pursue someone, the question becomes: Is this person as interested as I am? If not, there is no need to continue further. I've spent long enough on this gentleman. While I didn't put my life on hold, I gave him too much mental space for too long. That ends now.