Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Turn(ed) Down for What?


     No one likes rejection. Sometimes you’re just not feeling someone’s vibe. You aren’t trying to be mean, but you just don’t mesh. Can you ever reject someone politely? 

     As I’ve gotten older, I have had to reject the advances of quite a few guys. I’m no Naomi Campbell, but I am much more attractive at 30 than I ever was as a teenager. I, myself was not always aesthetically pleasing, so I try to let men down gently when I’m not attracted to them. As you may have guessed, my polite vetoes are not always well received. Some guys get quite upset and downright rude, while others simply move forward.

     One night, when Liza and I decided to blow off some steam and go dancing, I was faced with this dilemma head on. I was approached by a guy who wasn’t quite my speed. We had just sat back down after dancing when a guy walked over and approached me. He had been with a large party about 10 ft. away. I’d spied one of the other guys at the table looking at me earlier, but I didn’t think anything of it.

     “Hey, how are you doing tonight?” the guy said standing in front of me.

    “Good,” I said inhaling the strong odor of PBR off his breath involuntarily.

     “I saw you on the dance floor,” he said.

     “Oh?”

     I noticed his friend who’d been looking at me, now burning a hole through me. His friend was more my speed. He also wasn’t in my face yammering about a boat show while reeking of cheap beer.

     “Is that your friend over there?” I asked interrupting the torrent of words.

     “Yeah, that’s Chris.”

     “Is he single too?”

     “Yes, he is.”

     “Could you tell him to come over here?” I asked.

     I confess, it sounded more polite in my head. Liza shot me a look of disbelief upon hearing my question. Only then did my words hit me.

     When negating someone’s advances, the best thing is to be polite but firm. How they take it is something that you have no control over. The important thing is that you remember how much moxie it takes to approach someone. Be considerate of that.

 

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