No one likes
rejection. Sometimes you’re just not feeling someone’s vibe. You aren’t trying
to be mean, but you just don’t mesh. Can you ever reject someone politely?
As I’ve gotten
older, I have had to reject the advances of quite a few guys. I’m no Naomi
Campbell, but I am much more attractive at 30 than I ever was as a teenager. I,
myself was not always aesthetically pleasing, so I try to let men down gently
when I’m not attracted to them. As you may have guessed, my polite vetoes are
not always well received. Some guys get quite upset and downright rude, while
others simply move forward.
One night, when
Liza and I decided to blow off some steam and go dancing, I was faced with this
dilemma head on. I was approached by a guy who wasn’t quite my speed. We had
just sat back down after dancing when a guy walked over and approached me. He
had been with a large party about 10 ft. away. I’d spied one of the other guys
at the table looking at me earlier, but I didn’t think anything of it.
“Hey, how are you
doing tonight?” the guy said standing in front of me.
“Good,” I said
inhaling the strong odor of PBR off his breath involuntarily.
“I saw you on the
dance floor,” he said.
“Oh?”
I noticed his
friend who’d been looking at me, now burning a hole through me. His friend was more
my speed. He also wasn’t in my face yammering about a boat show while reeking
of cheap beer.
“Is that your
friend over there?” I asked interrupting the torrent of words.
“Yeah, that’s
Chris.”
“Is he single
too?”
“Yes, he is.”
“Could you tell
him to come over here?” I asked.
I confess, it
sounded more polite in my head. Liza shot me a look of disbelief upon hearing
my question. Only then did my words hit me.
When negating
someone’s advances, the best thing is to be polite but firm. How they take it
is something that you have no control over. The important thing is that you
remember how much moxie it takes to approach someone. Be considerate of that.
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