Primary Colors

     My generation is known for being the limit testers and the ones who blur the lines. While this is true, there are some old notions that still linger.

     I remember during college, my friends Talia, Christina, and I were hanging out. It was in the fall and unseasonably warm.

    "There are no men around," Christina opined.

     "What are you talking about? I see men everywhere," I said.

     It was true; the downtown of my friend's city was bustling. I saw men at every turn. The closer we got to the nearby college, the more men we saw.

     "I mean, for me. We all know you'll date anyone," she said.

     I took offense. What did she mean "anyone"? I was pretty sure that I had standards.

    "What is that supposed to mean?" I asked pointedly.

     "You know, you don't date black guys," she said nonchalantly.

     This floored me. In this day in age, I thought we were over that. I've always just liked guys. Their "paint jobs" weren't an issue. Obviously each person is attracted to different things, but I didn't think it was big deal. The more I talk to my friends; I find that this idea still hangs on. Some of my guy friends have told me outright that their parents would be upset if they brought someone home who was a different race.

     I have always been of the belief that no matter what color a person is, they will either treat you right or not. Besides, an attractive person is attractive no matter what color they are. My maternal grandparents never cared who I dated as long as they treated me right. Given their own heritages they couldn't. My grandfather was of Seminole Native American and African American decent and my maternal grandmother is Bahamian and Irish. As a child I remember their friends being all different races. It was never discussed. People are people. My dating history has been diverse. I didn't do it to prove a point, it just happened. I find men attractive. I couldn't care less about ethnicity and I most certainly do have standards. I don't see the point in ruling out a potential significant other based on a lack or difference in melanin. Don't misunderstand me, I get that not everyone is attracted to people of other races. As long as that lack of attraction is not based on racist ideas and notions, I don't see a big deal.

     No matter who you choose to date, the most important thing is that you care about that person. All other factors should be secondary. At the end of the day, isn't that what matters?