Exes and Ohs

     When you live in close proximity to your ex, seeing each other is inevitable. The best way to handle it is to be mature and keep to yourself. What if this isn't an option?

     Recently, I popped into one of my favorite bars on a Sunday to watch the game and listen to one of my favorite d.j.s spin. I took a seat at the bar next to an acquaintance that I will call Keith, for the sake of anonymity. I noticed that my ex was sitting further down at the bar. Only Keith and another woman separated us. This didn't bother me. I wasn't there to see him. I assumed he'd watch the game and not bother me. I assumed wrong.

     I turned on my stool to watch the game behind me. I felt him looking at me. A few moments later he stopped in front of me on his way to the restroom and said, "Hi."

     "Hi," I replied and kept watching the game.

     He went back to his bar stool. Keith quietly explained to the woman sitting on the other side of him that the guy sitting on her left was my ex. I'm still wondering who asked him to do this.

     No sooner had I begun enjoying the game again, did my ex walk past me again to use the restroom.

     "How have you been?" he asked

     "Good," I replied trying not to engage him.

     After my ex returned to his stool, Keith decided it was time to try and make things weird.

     "You could smile," he said to me as I watched the game.

     "I'm watching the game and I'm content," I said trying to hide my irritation.

     I knew what he was trying to do. I lack patience for people who stir the pot.

     "What's wrong with you?" Keith asked my ex.

     "Nothing. Just watching the game."

     Keith then decided he wanted to do shots.

     "Carl," he started. "Give me four buttercrowns. One for all four of us."

     The bartender knows I don't drink. I was having a my customary cranberry juice and soda. Carl the bartender enlightened Keith, thankfully.

     "She doesn't drink," he said.

     "Oh. Well, just make it three then."

     Really? Even if I did drink, why would I want to raise a glass with an ex that I still don't want to be bothered with. (See "Text From an Ex" entry)

     Finally, my ex started putting on his coat and saying his goodbyes. I hoped he would leave without bothering me. No such luck.

     Once again, he stopped in front of me as I watched the game.

     "Can I have a hug?"

     "What?" I asked

     I couldn't believe the question. After what he'd put me through when we dated, now he wanted a hug. I was fairly certain that I told him never to contact me again when we broke up. I also meant in public.

     Now it was my turn to give the stankface. I side hugged  him, rolled my eyes, and continued watching the game. Apparently, he needed closure. When we broke up, I didn't. I was relieved. The end of our relationship was just abysmal.

     As sure as the sky is blue, you can be certain that you'll see your ex. How you handle it is up to you. No matter how those around you behave, keep moving forward. It's only awkward if you allow it to be.